Book thoughts - "A promised land", Barack Obama
Reflection on my grandfather's death. Turning 33
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Hi!
I turn 33 today. The older I get, the more I feel I have so much to be grateful for. Especially the people I have around me, and my good fortunes in life. I feel more aware of how most of the things which occupied my attention and thoughts in my younger days were really foolish. Most of all, I feel more that there are issues with the world and a sense that I need to be doing more to contribute to a better world.
Book Thoughts - “A Promised Land”, Barack Obama
I finished reading “A Promised Land” this week. I enjoyed it very much firstly because it was an entertaining and candid look at American politics. Secondly, because it was a summary of the major current affairs events in the last 15 or so years. It reminded me of my interest in international history as a JC student, and felt like an update to my syllabus which stopped at the end of the Cold War.
Three things stood out to me while reading:
Focus on having right process for making decisions.
The book tries to give an insight into Obama’s thinking as he made difficult decisions as President. A big part of this is his focus on applying the right process to making a decision. His conviction in his decisions comes from his belief that he tried to apply the best process. This is separate from whether the decision turns out right or wrong, and in the kind of high stakes decisions he makes, it is never clearly on one end.
Even though we aren’t making presidential decisions, we should still pay more attention to our own decision making. Too many everyday decisions and beliefs are made on weak evidence, gut feels, or impulses. Evaluations are made based solely on on results, even if the right thought process was applied. Our minds also fall prey to impulses and tricks. Even company valuations or investment decisions are more likely arbitrary estimates rather than based on deep science and calculation, and all the work later simply to justify a decision with hindsiht. The cumulative effects of poorly considered decisions add up and hold back our collective progress.
Don’t let perfection get in the way of progress.
Obama describes the various political negotiations with his vast field of stakeholders. Even those with a similar ideology to him would constantly criticise his policies for compromising to reach an agreement, failing to meet all their demands, or not doing enough. These ignores the reality that without such compromise, nothing would be done at all, and the internal criticism hurts his own credibility.
This tendency happens in daily life too. We forget that progress must be earned one step at a time, in a balanced manner. Expecting unrealistic demands to materialise immediately only stalls things and maintains the status quo. I experience this when trying to embark on new projects and abandoning them because they don’t look good enough. When trying to improve myself, whether it be exercise, parenting, or work, it is not uncommon for me to fixate on how far I am from my aims, and miss out the progress on the way. This mismatch is worst when it happens between those actually doing the work, and those who are simply commenting from the sidelines, creating unrealistic expectations that can never be met.
Family comes before the Presidency
Despite holding one of the most influential offices in the world, the feel I get when reading is that he is more proud of his family than his presidency. His wife and daughters are repeatedly mentioned throughout the book. He also writes about his worries in trying to balance his personal aims, his duties, and his family.
I relate to this. Whenever I find it hard to juggle time between Joy and other pursuits, I think how many others have held far greater responsibilities and had far greater achievements, while having more kids than I do.
Those close to me would often hear me complain about how I have no time due to parenting. The truth though, is that the reduced time does not change my performance. In fact, I find myself doing better in all my pursuits than before I was a parent. I am a more proficient martial artist, I feel fitter and more healthy, I am a better cook, I read and write more, and even my gaming has improved. More time is sometimes an illusion. If we were not efficient before, more time would only be filled with inefficiency. Somehow I feel being a parent has sharpened my own behaviors to help me channel my limited energy more effectively.
A last memory of my Grandfather
It was not too long ago that I wrote about my grandmother passing away. Now, I write about my grandfather who passed away last week. At the ripe old age of 92, and hopefully meeting my grandmother in the afterlife, it was not difficult for me to cope with the grief, especially since I managed to see him and have a final meal with him just before he passed away.
My grandfather was one of my primary caregivers as a child. He used to keep me occupied by teaching me to read, write, and count. To their generation, preparing us for academic life, the privilege they never had, has always been important. Somehow, an image that flashed back to me several times during the memorial is of us by a multiplication table poster in my bedroom, with him teaching me to memorise it.
Nearly 30 years wiser, I wonder what impact moments like these had on my life. The school exam system has never been a challenge for me. Is that to my own credit though? Or is it the cumulative result of a good headstart given to me by people such as my grandfather, and the subsequent pygmalion effect where confidence in myself and of those around me are what contributed more to where I am now.
Our current meritocratic system does not know how to account for these arbitrary differences. People might succeed differently in life despite similar innate ability and effort. More needs to be done to close up this gap for the world to become more equitable. For now though, I can only remain grateful to my grandfather, who likely had a greater hand in nudging me onto a more fortunate life than any of my own choices.
Have a good week!
James
Thanks for reading! I do hope to hear about your thoughts or ideas!
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