Getting comfortable with doing nothing
Hi!
I found myself with a poor mood the past two weeks. A big factor was a feeling that I was not being productive enough. Most of my time was being spent on mindless or repetitive tasks around the home, rather than more exciting things. There was a frustrating feeling of life stagnating, and falling behind.
With all the restrictions now it can be hard to find the small wins we normally have to mark progress. Self training at home lacks the same feeling of accomplishment of completing a wing chun or muay thai class, that tells me that I have gotten something done for the day.
My frustrations became a bigger problem than the actual lack of productivity. I tried to compensate by multitasking and rushing, and ended up failing to properly focus and everything was being done badly. My ability to regulate emotions and make good decisions as affected. With a month of staying home to go, I knew I had to spend some time trying to sort this through in my own head.
Does my perceived productivity really improve my life? It is not uncommon to read about a distinction between speed and velocity in life. Constant action without moving towards one's true goals is merely speed. If I really had the chance to do what I wanted, would it lead to accomplishing what is important in my life? Maybe I could keep up with the news better, finish the Final Fantasy 7 remake earlier, clear my backlog of esports, or watch some of those shows my friends talk about that I have no time to check out. When I start to look at it from a distance, these are far from important. Maybe instead, that time I spend playing with my daughter or managing the house is real advancement in life.
I can still be making progress by doing nothing. The Wing Chun system I practice avoids exciting and large movements, preferring to conserve energy for efficient bursts only when the right opportunity happens. I should try and internalise this in my own life, rather than constantly try to resist unsuccessfully against periods of inactivity. Those moments are still productive by restoring energy. They give the time to think about priorities, to make sure I move in the right direction later on. They also train focus, getting used to the stillness, an important skill for tackling hard tasks later on.
Keeping up is impossible. With more content than we can ever consume, more skills than can be learnt, and more things that can be done in one lifetime, it is impossible and unnecessary to keep up with everything. The frustration from doing nothing comes from wanting too much. This often originates from comparison with others. Instead of doing more, I can try to get better at editing what I want and need in life, to make sure they fit within what resonates with my soul and what I have the resources to achieve.
Why is there an urgency to be productive anyway? One likely contributor is action bias, that we constantly feel a need to be doing something. This is a cognitive dissonance, and we simply prefer action over inaction due to impatience rather than true benefit. Another possible reason may have been drilled into us as students, that we cannot waste any time or we will very quickly fall behind everyone else. Perhaps what might have been useful to motivate a procrastinating student is not actually applicable to a real life, with differing goals and circumstances.
If you are experiencing something similar, I hope this helps you remember too that it is not unproductive to be doing nothing. Of course, even after rationalising all this, it is still a challenge for me to keep my calm and enjoy the stillness when stuck reading "Have you seen my cat" for a hundredth time, or washing a never ending pile of dishes. So if it still feels difficult to you too, I understand completely.
Stay safe!
James
About Ideothetic Flow
Ideothetic Flow is a small passion project following my own thoughts about living life better and think of how we can be better human beings. Every 2 weeks I share something I find interesting, usually related to challenging common expectations or ideas.